Tag Archives: party

Pick a peck of (dog) poop!

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

For a lot of people, me included, this is our favorite time of the year. The snow is melting, trees are budding and when I went to I drive to work this morning it was even a little lighter than normal outside. These are all very good things and sure signs that spring is finally on its way here.

Maybe I am putting the cart ahead of the horse a little bit, it is just the first week of March and Mother Nature loves to drop some white, fluffy, cold stuff on us when we least expect it. She’s a bitch that way. One day it can be 50 degrees and sunny and the next its snowing and school gets cancelled. But that being said, we are all thinking spring and enjoying some warm weather again.

My husband and I had a large brick deck added to our house late summer last year but because of Covid and some other things going on we really didn’t get the opportunity to spend a lot of time outdoors entertaining on it like we usually do. Over the past few weeks I have been dreaming of ways to decorate the deck. I’m thinking a big outdoor rug with pretty colors to match the outdoor pots I purchased in Wisconsin last year. I’m also thinking one of those wicker swinging outdoor chairs that hangs from its own support pole will be my spot, with a glass of wine of course, and enjoying the sun. I ordered some colorful candles to put on the outdoor bar that will match the rug. We are ready to go!

This past Sunday I got up early and poured myself a big cup of coffee and walked into the family room to let the dog out one of the sliding glass doors that leads out to the deck. The dog grabbed his favorite toy and headed outside. I took a big sip of coffee and looked out at the deck. That is when I saw it, dog shit. All winter we have let the dog out the same sliding glass door. In the beginning of the year, the dog went around the corner and did his business. As winter moved on and the nights got colder and we got more, and more snow the dog went shorter and shorter distance away from the deck. Soon Cerberus didn’t know where the grass started and the deck began. Our rather spoiled three headed dog that guards the portal to hell (Cerberus, look it up) was too cold, or too chicken to take a piss or a poop off the deck any distance.

Everyone who has a dog knows this feeling, the (literal) Shit! I have to clean up dog poop feeling. During the summer I kept up well with picking up dog shit outside although I did not like it, who does. Still, who wants to walk through your yard and step in shit, or see shit, or smell shit. Hot shit, by the way, really stinks which I think is kind of also funny considering the people I know who think they are hot shit, clearly are not, but in fact do stink.

I think I still have a few weekends of thinking about picking up the shit before I actually have to pick it up, but still its there. Every time I look outside I see it and there is a lot of it! Some of it is in the grass, but some of it is on the deck too. My husband hates that there is shit on the deck by the way and really wants me to go out and at least push it off or pick it up. I keep saying I will, but haven’t. Yuck. I could hire someone to come out and pick it all up for me, but the idea of paying someone to pick up the shit of my dog just doesn’t seem right. Maybe I can train Cerberus to pick it up himself? Ok, probably not, but maybe its worth a shot. Maybe I can trade my husband tasks, he might be up for it (use your imagination wink wink). Or maybe I will just have to say shit in this article one more time, put on my big girl panties and some rubber gloves and get out there and do it! Shit…